Wednesday, October 6, 2010

On the Rainy River -- Personal Response

Respected by others, or respected by myself?
A life of blood-stained hands, feeling trapped within my own skin,
Or a lifetime free from the shackles of expectation?
Condemned for my cowardice from the ones who love me,
Or honoured for living a lie?
A decision was made on the Rainy River.

I am a coward,
Sentenced to a life of respect and admiration I don’t deserve.
I fought, and I survived,
But a part of me was lost to the fog of war.
On the outside I may stand strong,
Yet my wounds will never heal.

I can not and will not justify my actions,
For a choice I made for the sake of others.
At the most important time in my life,
My courage reservoir was drained dry,
My heroic attributes non-existent.
We won the battle, but I was the sacrifice.

Let my story be told again and again,
Let them shout it from the heavens, despite my betrayal.
I am no soldier, no Lone Ranger,
No secret hero of olden days.
I am simply a man, no more and no less.
My resolve, unfortunately, not strong enough.
I don’t expect to be understood or forgiven,
But this conscience has waited far too long for rest.

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